Mistakes Women Usually Do During Sex

Failing to initiate sex is one of the biggest mistakes women make.  “Most guys feel like they are always the initiator and that sets up disequilibrium on the passion scale in the relationship,” he says.  Generally, men want to be pursued by their partners just as much as women do. Most women find themselves frustrated and disappointed when it comes to sex, and the blaming it all to their men. Have you ever wondered if maybe you’re doing it all wrong? You need a little self-examination and ask yourself if you’re also doing your share when it comes to sex. Making love is one of the most pleasurable enjoyable activities for lovers you should definitely be grateful of. You see a lot of articles about what men can do during sex to make it better for the woman, but there’s a lot less information – and opinion – on the mistakes women make. So, to set the record straight, here’s the list of things for women to avoid.

Making him do all the work.
Are you lying there like a log all night? Have you been contended by just taking off your clothes and letting your man to the work? Initiate sex for a change. Moan, groan and let him know you’re having a great time. Turning you on makes you man turned on so go ahead and let it show.

Being insecure of your body.
Feeling too fat? You think you’re not sexy enough? A woman who takes pride and is comfortable in her own skin will make you look more desirable. Men love their women who are confident for what they are.

Expecting him to read your mind.
Let him know what you want, tell him what’s on your mind! Men are not mind readers so it’s your responsibility to let him know about your wants and needs, he’ll be more than happy to comply. For him, the physical pleasure of sex is a reward in itself. He doesn’t need to be seduced into feeling desire (though he may appreciate it if you do seduce him!), at least most of the time, for his sex drive is a pretty constant part of his maleness. That’s what women don’t understand.

Not showing your sexual energy.
Women who were brought up to be demure “good girls” (i.e. non-sexual) may find it difficult to express the essence of their feminine energy during sex. And a lot of women also have problems expressing their anger, an emotion which can add real spice to the sexual union between men and women. This lack of sexual energy might appear as a reluctance to initiate sex, a reluctance to be the active partner, a reluctance to make noises or thrust, or simply an overall tendency to wait for the man to lead and direct what happens during sex. Your man will really like it when you express your passion – whether that means you getting on top for woman on top sex, moving in a way that will give you the greatest pleasure, kissing him passionately, or being assertive about what you want in bed.

Women, they know how elusive and emotional their own sex drive is, but they don’t appreciate how different it is for a man. Think of it this way: men can enjoy sex with their partner whether they are feeling loving or not; in fact they often find their feelings of love for their partner when they have sex with her. By contrast, women often say they need to feel loving before they want sex – or at least before they are prepared to give themselves heart and soul to a man.

Being too gentle when you touch his penis
Men like a firmer touch than women, especially when it comes to their penises. If you ever have the pleasure of watching him masturbate, you’ll see how much pressure he uses on his penis – especially as he nears orgasm. If you’re doing it for him, ask him to tell you what you’re doing right and what he’d like done differently. He’ll really appreciate your efforts to give him more pleasure.

Believing He’s Always Up for Sex
Sure, most teenage boys are ready and willing just about any time you ask, but not true for men. The pressures of everyday life — family, work, bills — can zap a man’s libido. This comes as a big surprise to many women, and often his lack of interest in sex is something we take personally.
“It comes as such a shock [to women] that they just don’t believe it,” Fisher says about the reaction many women have when their partner says they aren’t in the mood for sex. “They know themselves that they are not always interested in sex but they still love the man. But when they discover he doesn’t want to have sex, they think, ‘he doesn’t love me.’ Not true. He just doesn’t want to have sex.”

Not experimenting with sex
The saying has it that men think about sex ten times an hour – or is it a hundred? Yes, of course that’s an exaggeration, but it isn’t much of one. While some women have a high sexual desire, it’s true to say that women in general are much less sexy than men when they’re not in the bedroom. Men fantasize all the time – about the things they see, what they’d like to do, how they’d like to do it, and so on. With such an active sexual imagination, it’s not hard to understand why a bit of variation in the bedroom routine can keep a man sexually happy.

Getting Upset When He Suggests Something New
After a couple has been together for a while, it’s natural to want to spice things up with a little variety. Just because your man wants to try something new doesn’t mean he’s unhappy with you or your sex life. In short: Don’t take it personally. Nobody should ever feel obligated to do something they don’t want to do in the personal and intimate area of sexuality. If your man asks you about trying something that’s outside of your morals, make it clear that it’s off limits for you and explain why. Of course, do this in a loving way as best you can. If it is something that is not really a moral issue for you but you still don’t want to, again explain why. If it is a simply a startling request and you’re initially uneasy about it, try not to overreact. Instead, let him know you need some time to think about it.

Criticizing him
One of the reasons women can be so critical of their man is that they’ve never learned the art of direct communication. Than means stating clearly and directly what you want, how you want it, and whether you got it – and how you feel about it afterwards. Men appreciate that style of talk – they know where they stand and it removes the uncertainty for them.
Criticism is an indirect way of saying that your needs are not being met – but if you read above, then maybe you’ve begun to understand that your man won’t know what you want unless you tell him. If you’re judging his love for you on the basis of his ability to anticipate and meet your needs without you saying what they are, well, I’m afraid you aren’t likely to be very satisfied. And it won’t be his fault.

Letting him take responsibility for your orgasm.
A lot of us think that a man somehow has a responsibility to “give” a woman an orgasm during sex. After all, that’s how a lot of us were brought up – that a man somehow has to look after “his” woman. And that idea extends to making sure she has an orgasm during sex…..but the truth is that women are responsible for their own orgasms. So while it might be nice for your man to help you get there, if you don’t make it to orgasm through his efforts, you can always take matters into your own hands.

Even if you don’t feel sexy or loving when you start making love, after a while the simple act of being physically connected in bed can really change the way you feel about each other. The other way of settling an argument (that’s talking, seeking understanding, and thrashing out how you feel) is fine: but once in a while try a more direct method of getting your feelings back on track – just go to bed together!

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